My Grandmothers -Martha and Dot (left, right). I miss them most during the holidays. Since they moved on, in the same year almost 5 years ago, I've missed them more with each passing holiday season. This election year I felt lonely when Grandma Martha didn't call me ranting her disapproval of Obama, which I know she would have done. I would have freely told her exactly how much I disagreed with her and we would have laughed hysterically about it. We had this understanding that allowed respect, honesty, and openness no matter what.
I missed Grandma Dot after I went back to blond, which I know would have won me her praises. She loathed my hair color experimentation throughout my twenties. Never said it, but I knew it. Only once I asked her, and she admitted that yes, she prefers me blond. I missed her a year ago when I was craving one her cookies. I can't believe I'll never taste one of her chocolate chip cookies ever again! And on Thanksgiving this year, trying to make her corn casserole and destroying it, I wished to be back at her table eating her food.
Two women more different than Martha and Dot I cannot imagine. I miss Grandma Martha's explosive wild laugh and Grandma Dot's quiet teary-eyed hissing.
Martha was passionate, hot tempered, smart, unafraid, unapologetic, honest, independent, humble, grounded and strong. I remember, not too long before her health began to fail, after a visit with her, my mother and I were ordered to take her to the city counsel meeting where she had a few things to say. Oh, how I wish I'd gone in there with her! She had no problem making scenes. Thrived on them, actually. I think it amused her, gave her pure joy. Feather-ruffling was her hobby. People were much too serious and phony for her.
To this day I have no idea what my Grandma Dot's beliefs were about politics or religion. A very quiet, reserved, tactful, diplomatic, mindful woman she was. Always polite, Dot made her opinions known rarely and only in a hushed manner. I know that she had a great many fears and lived cautiously. She was intelligent, thoughtful, knowledgeable, and well-read with a great appreciation for beauty of all sorts: fashion, art, landscapes, food, music. Never wearing her emotions on her sleeve, she was a mystery to me always. I wished to know what she thought about things, wondered how she felt about life. Still do, even more.
Martha and Dot, my beautiful grandmothers, I know you're there. I carry your lessons, your passions, your interests, and your love with me every day and for this we'll never be far apart.
5 comments:
Deann that made me cry! I miss them so much too. It's so sad that they were taken from us too early. I will never forget Grandma M yelling at me to take her to Jack in the Box for ice tea with extra lemon or calling me up to laugh with me on the phone. I will never forget Grandma D cookies that came in a shoebox or her "hello" when she answered her phone. I am so blessed that my girls got to know their great grandmothers and they have those memories. They remember swimming at Grandma Dot's pool & eating chips and cream cheese w/salsa and of course kool aid and Grandma Martha sipping hot sauce packets from taco bell and her woody woodpecker laugh!! Thanks Deann that was a nice tribute to them!
I loved seeing and knowing both of your grandmas! Martha always made me laugh and had the funniest voice. And Dot was so sweet, she was a lot like my own Grandma Wanda.
Deann, thank you. That was a pretty tribute to your grandmothers. They would be so happy to hear your feelings for them. I think I was really good about telling them both my feelings while they were here and for that I'm grateful. I miss my mom EVERYDAY and now I'm tearing up so I can't talk about her anymore. And Grandma Dot was a mystery at times but learned by necessity to camo her real self. I'm so thankful for both these women who unconditionally loved their children and helped me be a better mom. I always think about them in heaven and wonder if they're buddies!
Thank you Deann for that reminder of all the wonderful qualities our grandmothers were made of. I have said to so many people that I wish I were older before they both passed away because I know I would have had so many great conversations with them. I will always have my special memories in my heart though!
You are so good with words. That was so beautiful. My grandma's are very differnt like yours. That just brought a bunch of memories flowing. Thanks, and know that I love all those qualites which you posses. I love your passion and tenderness.
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